This time of year brings up so many emotions – childhood nostalgia, joy, wonder and excitement.  But for some, it can feel extra lonely and just plain anxiety-provoking. Anxiety can be so debilitating and I know I’m not the only one who has felt a little heightened anxiety this time of year.

Although it can be a difficult topic to bring up with loved ones, it would be great if you could share with someone you feel safe with and you’d probably be surprised at how common seasonal anxiety actually is.

Some people may be physically lonely—with few or no friends nearby, they may be elderly or unwell and can’t get out and about, or may have just lost a loved one. This season can be particularly hard for these people and it makes sense. But sometimes none of these apply to us and our anxiety is completely nonsensical – this can make us feel ashamed and pretty quickly we can start beating ourselves up for not being grateful for what we have, which just makes us feel worse.

I’ve always loved the Nike mantra “Just Do It”. Just take the first step, that’s it—but for some of us the first step is the hardest part. So for those with anxiety, all of the Christmas parties and New Years Eve happenings and family get togethers are too much. Then throw Covid-19 into the mix and it just got harder.

The struggle is real, my friend. And although it’s not something I’ve completely mastered, I have had a bit of experience in implementing strategies to help me squash anxiety during this season (and all seasons). Here are some of the things that have helped me through the years:

01 BE FRIENDLY

If you want friends, be a friend. Host a dinner at your place – your home is usually your safe space, so the anxiety caused by ‘showing up’ somewhere is taken out of the equation. Or you could reach out to invite a friend to coffee or lunch at a local café. Or maybe even meet for a picnic in the park. You will probably make your friend’s day with the invitation – they may be feeling a bit lonely or anxious themselves.

Of course, if the Covid-19 situation flairs up at any time, as it has over the last couple of years, why not host a Zoom get-together? We had a weekly Zoom family catch-up during our last lockdown and it was fun and really comforting.

02 BREAK DOWN THE OVERWHELM

Overwhelm is common at this time of year, but it can happen any time. You could be overwhelmed by your own goals for the year that haven’t been met, how much work you still have to get done, or maybe it’s a lack of things to do and you’re overwhelmed with boredom.

Accepting that you may not achieve all of your life’s goals is a tough one. Especially if you’re like me and there is just so much you want to do. But acknowledging that even if I haven’t accomplished everything, I HAVE accomplished some things, is the key. I have found that writing a quick list of everything I’ve done in the last year, or even the last week or month to begin with, helps me to see that I have actually progressed and I can pat myself on the back for my achievements so far!

Often the best way to tackle the big life goals is to break them down into smaller chunks. Create a to-do list of tasks involved with your big goal and tick them off as you go. Even if it only took you a few minutes to do a particular task, you’ll feel like you’ve achieved something and this will spur you on to keep going. For me, being productive in this way is the solution to feeling overwhelmed. For example, if my big goal is to license or sell my art, the first task on my to-do list is to get doodling. I just need to start somewhere. Pick up a pencil, grab my iPad. Start small and grow from there.

Now if you’re overwhelmed by boredom or you’re in a creative slump, find a project that you may have been putting off because it’s not that sexy. Things like organising your home office, going through your art supplies, or doing your tax. Or do something that’s really sexy like taking an online ukulele class, or get reading the stack of books on your bedside table.  The downtime that many of us experience at this time of year can actually be seen as a real positive – to have time to get really organised for the new year or to learn something new is such a luxury. Embrace it!

03 QUESTION THE SELF-DOUBT

I love hearing people in the creative community saying ‘there’s room for everyone’. It really helps me to overcome the nagging self-doubt that regularly rears its ugly head. There’s always something out there that can effect your self-confidence – a better artist, a more successful ukulele player, and so on. But if you take a moment to question yourself and ask why you’re comparing yourself, you may be surprised at what you realise. I actually don’t have to be better than or like anyone else. I just have to do my own thing and be my true, unique self and that is enough. Saying it can lead to believing it, which can lead to making it so. Self-affirmations have been a wonderful tool for me in combating self-doubt. There is room for me. I am enough. Everything is okay.

04 BRAIN DUMP

Many years ago I read a book called ‘The Artist’s Way’ by Julia Cameron. I highly recommend it. Basically, Julia encourages a daily practice called ‘Morning Pages’ where you write 3 pages of longhand, stream of consciousness writing, done first thing in the morning. The idea is that it gets your creative juices flowing.

But I liken it to a brain dump for alleviating anxiety. You might call it morning pages, journaling, or a ‘brain dump’ like me, but just grab a sheet of paper, write down everything on your mind (don’t try to make sense of it), just write anything that pops into your head anywhere on the page (or pages). And then just put it aside and see how you feel. Sometimes I just screw it up and chuck it in the bin. But it somehow alleviates my anxiety and I’m ready to take on the day.

Another helpful strategy for me is writing to-do lists and ticking them off. Once all my daily tasks are on the page I no longer have to worry that I’m forgetting something and suddenly my plan for the day is crystal clear. The list alone somehow takes a huge chunk of anxiety away and then going through each task one by one and crossing them off as I go makes me mega productive.  It doesn’t matter how simple the task, add it to your list.  For example, I often add things as basic as ‘buy milk and bread’ – it will feel good ticking it off as done, I promise.

05 SEEK HELP

If anxiety is overwhelming your daily life, I encourage you to seek professional help. I have really benefitted from therapy over the years, especially after going through cancer twice. Health or any other challenges can certainly tip you over the edge and you should never be ashamed to ask for help or to take prescribed medication if that’s what you need for a time. Find a GP or a psychologist you feel comfortable with – it may just be the best thing you’ve ever done for yourself.

06 OTHER THINGS THAT MAY HELP

• Go for a walk or run
• Try something new eg. bake a new recipe or learn an instrument
• Doodle, draw or paint, for no other reason except to just create for yourself and have fun
• Take a short break from watching the news – it can be depressing
• Have a morning routine – eg. I love having my oats and fruit for breakfast after a run
• Text, call or FaceTime a family member, friend or creative buddy
• Meditate or listen to calming music
• Practice yoga or do some stretches
• Do a mindless, calming task like organising your junk drawer or do the dishes
• Take a few deep breaths
• Have a short break from Instagram and stop comparing yourself

Wishing you all the very best of health and happiness for this holiday season and the new year!

Jennifer xo

Disclaimer: This post is not meant to serve as professional health advice. Please seek guidance from a qualified professional if needed.